I enjoy painting. writing. primping. 90's and also R&B music, not 90's R&B hahaha dancing. laughing. the beach under the moon light. I am very creative. I like to make visions in my head come to life in front me. I am a hair stylists and an event planner. I love Jesus with every ounce of my heart. I prefer a light, giggly atmosphere with people who enjoy the same. Yes I said giggly. I have a million plans and goals in my head that one day I would like to complete. I love to see the good in others because they already know the bad no need to remind them. I am nice to everyone. I expect the same in return. If you make me laugh I will remember you forever. Laughter is the greatest emotion in life!! Well maybe love is but usually laughter leads to love in my opinion.
My absolute hands down favorite things are:
Baskin Robins peanut butter chocolate ice cream
Urban decays electric pallette
American eagle jeans
Jessica Simpson heels & handbags, okay anything that has her name on it!!
Bellami hair extensions
Skater skirts & crop tops ( however that's not practical these days)
However people for some reason usually only know me as 'the Twins mother' or 'travis' wife'. But let me take a moment to tell you more about Jessica, not the twins mother or Travis' wife but just me!
99% of the time the above doesn't bother me, I obviously love being those two things but that 1% has been making an appearance lately. Yes of course I will always be those two things and chose to be. But I am an individual too, I was someone before I was a wife and mother. I had a name that people had to remember because they couldn't just call me something else.
Very rarely when I do get the chance to go somewhere or just be ALONE it's so refreshing. I can just go back to being me, just me, with relatively no responsibilities for the moment. And yes it feels wonderful. Last night was one of those nights. I had to go to a company mixer in wilmington which required me to be dolled up and just be Jessica all night. In moments like that I feel empowered and like I own where I am. I feel confident in myself, making people remember my name, not how many children I have or someone's wife.
To be honest for that 45 minute drive I'm easily taken back to the days of my scion and the rooftop open with my speakers pounding out bass. Carefree and fun, self esteem overflowing, heels and perfect hair. The things that I enjoyed and yes thats what defined me. A body before children, hair before children yes it was soooo much better!! Those little red headed boys have done a number to my physical appearance I tell ya! I could wear what I wanted and didn't have to worry about it being 'too short' or my heels 'too high' because I wasn't bending over with two little ones tugging at me. I actually had a wardrobe now it's slightly depressing to go shopping and be able to just buy what I want without thinking is it practical!!
I guess what I am rambling about is I need to take time for me to be me. For everyone's benefit!! Because just being out for a few hours last night was refreshing! Now I feel ready to tackle today with my snotty nose handsome little boys. I am a better wife and mother when I get a moment to just go be me! It really is so very important. It's a given that being a mother and wife and all three of my boys are in my 'favorites' list, I just didn't think I had to mention it. Of course I don't wish to have that life back before children they obviously are my world but I just like to be honest when I write because what good will it do to hide how I really feel? Who will I ever help hiding feelings and acting like I am the perfect wife and mother and human being. No one. So maybe I will try to have a glam night out at least once a month if not twice:)
No comments:
Post a Comment